Amber K. from [x]
Do not steal my post or words.(via darkness-consumed-me)
Do NOT romanticize everything you see online. Stop sentimentalizing self harm. That picture of that boy “fixing” his girlfriend and kissing her scars? That is never going to happen. There is no Effy and Freddie. Cancer will not help you find your perfect Hazel-Augustus relationship. Being that girl leaning over the toilet with smudged mascara is not beautiful. Hating yourself is one of the worst feelings in existence. A rotting body wasting away until death, you do not want that. You do not want to be that suicidal boy with tears cascading down his cheeks. Abusive relationships are truly damaging. Dark rimmed ringlets under your eyes will not make you creative, artsy, or mysterious. Shaking hands, constant jitteryness, and overwhelming anxiety, OCD, or AD(H)D will not make you adorably quirky and it won’t make someone love you. Stop glamorizing self harm, suicide, eating disorders, body image issues, cancer, etc. Don’t you dare pretend to have anxiety, schizophrenia, OCD, AD(H)D, or any other serious disorder. That is attention seeking and people who pretend to have a disorder cause these horrible stigmas. In all honesty, these issues are far from the stigmas floating around, so do not bother pretending.
You want to romanticize something? Magnify your dreams and aspirations towards positive things. Idealize a positive lifestyle. Obsess over hipster clothing. Gush over celebrities. Dream of a faraway place. Do anything, except scroll through Tumblr with intentions of living a sad life worth writing about.
If someone were to die at the age of 63 after a lifelong battle with MS or Sickle Cell, we’d all say they were a “fighter” or an “inspiration.” But when someone dies after a lifelong battle with severe mental illness and drug addiction, we say it was a tragedy and tell everyone “don’t be like him, please seek help.” That’s bullshit. Robin Williams sought help his entire life. He saw a psychiatrist. He quit drinking. He went to rehab. He did this for decades. That’s HOW he made it to 63. For some people, 63 is a fucking miracle. I know several people who didn’t make it past 23 and I’d do anything to have 40 more years with them.
I think about dying but I dont want to die. Not even close. In fact my problem is the complete opposite. I want to live, I want to escape. I feel trapped and bored and claustrophobic. There’s so much to see and so much to do but I somehow still find myself doing nothing at all. I’m still here in this metaphorical bubble of existence and I can’t quite figure out what the hell I’m doing or how to get out of it.